Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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