I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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