She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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