I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
