shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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