You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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