Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
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