Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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