Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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