i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I have fence marks all over my body
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
