So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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