It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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