We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
