Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize