i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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