What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
