so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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