Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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