i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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