They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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