Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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