wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
