Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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