she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
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He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
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And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.