Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
