I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize