I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
