Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize