I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
