i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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