I love black thongs
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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