____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
