Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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