Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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