i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
