i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
