The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
