Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
