Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers http://tfl.nu/yb16
  Replies (4) Good night (629) Bad night (862) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): You had a beer at 10:30 this morning? (1-905): Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol. http://tfl.nu/apvz
  Replies (30) Good night (3742) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen. http://tfl.nu/vaik
  Replies (13) Good night (1088) Bad night (3489) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad? http://tfl.nu/p7vn
  Replies (39) Good night (672) Bad night (4475) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on http://tfl.nu/ommd
  Replies (31) Good night (3978) Bad night (1359) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive http://tfl.nu/u57a
  Replies (13) Good night (4405) Bad night (1231) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend. http://tfl.nu/zf6u
  Replies (14) Good night (5106) Bad night (833) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often http://tfl.nu/iv13
  Replies (25) Good night (4273) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I wonder if you can snort coke upside down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I wonder if you can snort coke upside down http://tfl.nu/eyfv
  Replies (20) Good night (1319) Bad night (2876) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome. http://tfl.nu/ko4x
  Replies (3) Good night (2036) Bad night (602) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West. http://tfl.nu/mnxm
  Replies (12) Good night (1721) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do? http://tfl.nu/fl2n
  Replies (5) Good night (719) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there http://tfl.nu/265p
  Replies (7) Good night (1370) Bad night (413) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced. http://tfl.nu/7v0e
  Replies (8) Good night (337) Bad night (962) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you. http://tfl.nu/hkpv
  Replies (2) Good night (1096) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt

Randomize