thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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