i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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