I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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