Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
