You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize