Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
