maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
