its not stalking. its research.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
