After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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