Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
