She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize