and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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